Is An Adoption Reunion A Good Idea?

The popularity of TLC’s Long Lost Family has made finding your adoptive family more accessible, and desirable, than ever. The notion of an “adoption reunion” has filled many people with hope that someday they might find their birth parent or adopted child.

Whether an adoption is due to infertility, an unplanned pregnancy or to fill a void in someone’s life, thousands of people choose adoption each year in the America. Since adoption is an option, doing a criminal background check online beforehand is important.

Both international and domestic adoptions occur to help benefit American families with whatever physical or emotional struggling they’re dealing with.

So now you’ve adopted or been adopted. What happens, years later, when you want some answers? Is an adoption reunion a good idea? How much is at stake?

An adoption reunion can definitely be done, using a phone number lookup free can help with this.

However, according to adoptionbirthmothers.com, there can be pitfalls:

“A successful adoption reunion means that both parties are able to have what works for them most of the time and when it doesn’t work they can be open and honest about the negative feelings without worrying that the whole relationship is going to get taken away from them (it’s unrealistic to say that anyone ever really feels 100% secure!).

A successful adoption reunion means that there is room to grow and mature as the relationships grows in trust and mutual understanding. It’s a big compromise, a dance, where both parties are willing to do what they can to make it work.

A successful adoption reunion meets the needs of both parties equally with each member carrying as equal loads of fear, insecurity, worries, etc.”

Here are some scenarios that are definite possibilities for an adoption reunion mishap:

1.    The person (parent or child) never shows.

2.    The reunion happens, but it’s a contentious meeting (the emotions are too super charged, and years of bitter feelings rise to the surface.)

3.    The reunion happens, but the relationship fizzles out soon after (did the adopted son seem more interested in a relationship at the reunion, but got back to his regular life and changed his mind?)

4.    The reunion happens, but expectations fall short (did the birth mother say she’d call ever week and didn’t?)

5.    One person’s emotional needs are met, but the other person’s isn’t (the adopted daughter says she only wanted to meet her birth mother, but now the birth mother wants to meet every month.)

6.    The image that one person has kept in their mind all these years doesn’t fit the real person, and there’s disappointment.

7.    The medical background an adoptee is seeking disappoints, and the adoptee doesn’t want to continue with the relationship out of anger (did the birth mother have heart disease, cancer, and other potential life-threatening diseases in her family history? That could build up some resentment.)

The Guardian is quick to point out that even adoption reunions have “honeymoon phases”, just like other intimate relationships:

“At the other end of the spectrum are reunions that quickly enter the "honeymoon period". "It can feel a bit like a love affair – but as with love affairs, the intensity doesn't automatically secure its future.”

But if you’re still up for finding the answers to your genetic and familial background, Hero Searches is a great place to start easy free background checks.